Love relationship are not only a territory where people receive pleasure and approval, but also become a field of mysteries, unpredictability, and mistakes. It’s very easy for the guy, which he initially considered the right thing to do. It's much easier to make mistakes at the beginning of a relationship than later, when the guy already knows the girl well.

Have you ever experienced similar situations?

1. You joked, and the girl was offended by you.
2. You helped another girl, and your beloved accused you of cheating.
3. You didn’t call her in the evening to wish her “good night,” and the next morning she mentally broke up with you.

Guys sometimes don't really commit serious mistakes, because of which girls could be offended by them. If you just didn't give flowers or didn't say beautiful word, when it was expected of you, then do not blame yourself for the wrong behavior. If you never give flowers to a girl or give her compliments, then this is already wrong behavior.

Anyone can make a mistake. And it’s good if girls give guys a chance to improve. However, mistakes are often fatal to relationships. For example, if you are cheating with other young ladies, then it is understandable why your companion decided to break up with you.

We will even call the behavior that men like to justify by saying that they were in a situation a mistake. drunkenness, committed on emotions or by accident. Justifications are arguments for complacency. However, they do not always work in relationships with girls. You can make excuses as much as you want. But if a girl breaks up with you or gets upset with you when you don’t want her to, then this is your problem. Here you need to consider the mistakes that are often made, so as not to make them and not spoil your life with them.

7 mistakes in relationships with girls

So, what are 7 mistakes a guy can make at the beginning of a relationship with a girl?

1. Offer to meet her.

If you directly offered to date her, and she asked to give her some time to think or wait a little, then don’t offer her a relationship anymore. The more and more often you invite a girl to meet, the less chance you have of starting a relationship with her. If one time was not enough for a girl to give you a clear answer, then let her be responsible for the consequences.

Communication with another girl can push her to date you. Make your girlfriend jealous by starting to communicate with other girls in front of her eyes. Let her think that you are no longer interested in her because she refused you or did not give an answer at all. Let it seem to her that you are starting to be interested in other girls, but they may definitely agree to date you.

By catching the eyes of your beloved with other girls, you can push her to quickly decide to date you or break up completely. Understand that the girl will agree to date you if she was initially inclined to do so, but for some reason she was capricious and did not give her answer. If she starts dating other guys after she saw you with other girls, then she was not initially ready to have a relationship with you, but simply kept you nearby so that you would look after her and brighten up her loneliness.

Another way to ask a girl to date is to not ask her at all. Just walk, meet. Believe me, if a girl is interested in you, then she is ready to date you. You are already building a relationship if she agrees to see you, spend time together, act as your girlfriend in front of your or her friends. And here there is no need for formal marriage proposals.

If a girl decides for herself not to date you, then she will not see and communicate with you often. And this is a sign for you - it’s time to look for another beauty who wants to date you.

1. Deceive yourself.

Before you start a relationship, decide what you want to get from it. You can have sex with girls, you can love them, you can build a family with them, or you can just be friends and have fun. Depending on your desires, choose a girl who will fit perfectly into the relationship you want to build.

For example, you only want to have sex with a girl. But then you come across one who is thirsty. She will not agree to be intimate with you until you start this serious relationship, confess your love to her, etc. Why do you need all these troubles? To get sex, you can simply devote time to those girls who are ready to give it literally at the very first meeting. To do this, you can go to a nightclub where girls drink and have fun. You can meet girls in short and revealing outfits.

In other words, don't waste your time in relationships you don't want. To do this, you first need to understand what kind of relationship you need.

1. Wrong choice of girl.

If, after creating a relationship, quarrels and conflicts immediately begin, this may indicate that the partners chose each other incorrectly. For example, someone has not decided on their desires in a relationship. If you only want, then the relationship with a partner who wants to build a long union will be conflictual.

Also incorrect choice partner may be due to incorrectly placed criteria. For example, if you need a serious relationship, then when choosing a girl, beauty should not be the only criterion. Undoubtedly, a girl must be beautiful. However, this criterion should not be the first.

You can make a mistake when choosing a girl if, for example, you start chasing a beauty who interests your friends. Quite often, guys like girls that other people like. Sports passion comes into play here, rather than true intentions to build a relationship. This should be clearly understood, at least for yourself, so that you know what exactly you are spending your time on.

1. Having bad sex.

Some guys may make the mistake of not offering their girls sex. Like, you need to get married first, and then persuade him to have sex. However, this approach is no longer relevant today. Today's girls tolerate the absence of sex for about a month, and then they begin to wonder why their boyfriends don't want them. Depending on what the girl decides for herself, she may eventually start or break up with him altogether.

The second mistake may be that guys do not satisfy their girls sexually. They have an orgasm, but they don’t think about whether the girls have achieved satisfaction. And this is their problem, since unsatisfied girls soon begin to look for lovers who will finally begin to satisfy them in bed.

Sex is definitely part of a relationship. However, you shouldn't wait until you're in a relationship to have sex. Often you need to have sex first so that partners understand whether they need a relationship or not.

1. Throw everything at her feet.

Absolutely all girls would like guys to throw the whole world at their feet. Absolutely everyone would like guys to indulge their whims and satisfy any desires. However, the fact turns out to be the following:

• Anyone who satisfies women's whims ends up henpecked.
• Anyone who indulges women's desires is cheated on.
• Those who throw the world at the feet of their loved ones are not loved and are eventually abandoned.

It turns out that the girl does not need to be loved completely. She shouldn't get everything she wants. She should not know about what causes you boundless love. She should not see what is your ideal and meaning of life. If you suddenly tell her something like “you are my whole life, I can’t live without you,” then get ready for the fact that she will sit on your neck or break up with you altogether.

Girls shouldn't feel like you can't live happily without them. On the contrary, young ladies cling to those guys who know their worth and can live without them comfortably, happily and fully. Let the girls understand that you will not grieve too much if you suddenly break up.

1. Love her first.

Who is the first to confess their love to another? Here girls often wait for the first move from guys. And even if you decide to confess your feelings, then do not make a victim out of your love. Let the girl understand that she is imperfect, but you love her. If she doesn't appreciate it, then you will fall in love with another girl along with her shortcomings.

You don't need to love a girl madly. Moreover, until you are sure that the young lady loves you mutually, it is better not to admit your feelings at all. Confess only when your relationship has taken place and you are 100% sure that the girl loves you.

1. Do nothing for the relationship.

You are already in a relationship. And here the guy can start making the following mistakes:

• Don't give time to the girl.
• Do not please her with gifts and pleasant words.
• Don't help her solve problems.
• Don't spend leisure time together.
• Hanging out with friends or constantly devoting time to work and not to the girl.

In other words, if you have a girlfriend, then you need to give her love, time, energy, attention, money, your body, emotions, thoughts, etc. If you do nothing to maintain the relationship, then you will lose it or the girl will start cheating on you while you are busy with your business.

Error elimination summary

Knowing what mistakes guys usually make, you can simply eliminate them. This will allow you to build the desired relationship with the young lady. modern world, and also not to lose them because of your stupidity. As a result, the girl will not even want to cheat on you if you follow the recommendations given.

Women are amazing in some of their qualities. For example, any woman can do the same thing over and over again and expect different results, regardless of age and level of education. How to get out of this vicious circle? After all, it is precisely because of the persistent actions of women themselves that they often develop problems in personal life.

The reaction to your actions is an indisputable fact... If you want to be a happy, attention-loving woman, you should change some habitual things that you don’t even attach importance to. These behavioral traits have their sad consequences!

Women's mistakes in relationships

Hyperfunctionality - property female psyche when a woman has poor self-control. She cannot stop actively acting and wants to do everything on her own, in no other way. She has answers to everything and will fight back against anyone. But why does this never bring happiness? Think about it…

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Unfortunately, the female sex sometimes shows boundless naivety, and sometimes even stupidity. But that's why we are women. And men say that they want to see a smart, smart young lady next to them. And who said that smart people can't they be naive and sometimes stupid at the same time? Nevertheless, let's try to understand their logic and find out what the most big mistakes girls in communication and relationships with guys - after all, this knowledge will help us facilitate communication and avoid annoying misunderstandings.

“If I called her, it doesn’t mean anything at all!”

This is the phrase guys say to their friends after you start acting like you’re already dating. Dear girls, guys are creatures who can call a bunch of their girlfriends to chat, even shower them with compliments, but this really won’t mean to them that he wants to be together with you. This way they raise their self-esteem, or really, the guy is just very sociable. So, after this, there is no need to make his phone blush, especially his home one, because his mother, sister can answer the phone there and the rigmarole of clarification begins, “what kind of girl called you,” “how old is she,” etc. And guys, oh, how they don’t like this.

Take a pause, if in the near future he starts calling you more often, or even invites you on a date, then you can already respond to his SMS, but it’s better not to put pressure on this matter. You can lose your sense of proportion and start to bother him.

Not all men like bright makeup.

Most girls put on a show to please men. They want to be more attractive, interesting and expressive. This is good if a woman wants to please her man. Especially if a man tells her that he looks very sexy, for example, smoky eye makeup or something else. This is wonderful, take note of it and use such an impeccable weapon. But, if your loved one says that he doesn’t want to kiss a powder compact, and he likes minimal makeup, then don’t think that he’s lying and he’s just sorry for the money for your cosmetics. If he said so, then it is so. We are already looking for a trick, but they often speak straightforwardly, the way they think.

If you want to stand out from the crowd, give yourself natural makeup, not a Papuan mask. Delicate pastel colors will give you freshness and youthful appeal. And this will be the most the best way attract your attention young man. Be natural.

Men don't like gossips and schemers.

Sometimes, girls discuss other people in their absence. It doesn't matter whether they do it openly or try to whisper to each other. After all, it’s still noticeable, and a self-respecting man will not tolerate this. Of course, we are all not without flaws. Male representatives can also sometimes discuss someone, but this is done quietly, without attracting attention to themselves. So you don’t need to flaunt your strengths at the expense of other people’s shortcomings, because you have them too.

PMS is not a reason to take it out on your loved one.

Dear women, remember that our beloved men do not understand how PMS can make you nervous and even freak out! Yes Yes. They will never understand this, unfortunately. And, if we allow ourselves to yell at them, and then “blame” it all on nerves caused by PMS, then they are sure that this is just our signature “excuse”. Oh, what a pity that you can’t change places with them for at least one cycle!

The mobile phone is my private property.

The male half of the world's population is furious that their girls are checking their mobile phones. This is their personal space, their world. You shouldn’t interfere with him, give him freedom, this is very important for men. It's better to just trust them and everything will be fine. After all, if he wants to cheat on you, he will do it regardless of whether you went through his phone or not.

Conversations about serious topics are scary.

On initial stage relationships, it is forbidden to start conversations on topics of family and children. All men are very jealous of their freedom. And this kind of talk just blows their minds. A picture immediately appears before their eyes in which he, like a free horse, runs away from slavery to freedom. Especially if the guy is still very young. Although this can scare away a man of thirty years of age or older.

Jealousy is a relationship killer.

A jealous girl first causes them bewilderment, and then anger. And, if this is causeless jealousy, then your relationship will not last long. Here you have to choose, either be jealous or build a relationship.

Friends are sacred.

So you start dating, he introduces you to his friends, but you don’t like them. One is a rude person, the second one curses every word, and so on. It would be a grave mistake if you start to conflict with them, because these are your boyfriend’s friends. It is better to gradually, slowly introduce him into your company, or meet new people and create your own common company. But for this you need to have patience and endurance.

Here we have listed the biggest mistakes girls make in communicating and relationships with guys. Take them into account and be happy!

To be honest, I can’t stand the expression “He left me.” This humiliates us, so it is preferable to call it “breakup”, “breakup” or something like that, even “in the mind”. A woman, trying on the image of an “abandoned” woman, destroys herself by this alone, reducing herself to the position of an inanimate object. However, today's conversation will not be about wording, but about how to keep a guy. What you need to do and how to behave so that you don’t get “abandoned.”

The initial stages of a relationship are usually relatively easy. Everything happens as if by itself, some faster, some slower, but that’s not the point. The main difficulties arise a little later, when the “caramel-flower period” has passed. What do I mean by this? - You have already confessed your love to each other, the first flowers, the first kisses and, possibly, the first sex are behind you, and now you are his girlfriend, and He is your boyfriend.

It would seem that hearts have been won and you can calmly “rest on your laurels,” but that was not the case. Any relationship, and especially gender relationships, is Full time job, which you won’t be able to skip, just as you won’t be able to delegate it to another person.
If you don't constantly remember the need to maintain a healthy relationship, the guy will leave you, and then you are doomed to search for the answer to the question: "".
I do not pretend to consider absolutely all the mistakes that women make when building a relationship with a guy, and I will focus only on the most common and fatal mistakes, in the hope that this will help you avoid them in the future or correct them (before it’s too late) , if you have already completed them.

Let's learn about the three most common types of behavior in women in which a guy is highly likely to “dump” you.

The woman is jealous

Jealousy is the most common and most fatal of all women's mistakes. I agree that it is very difficult not to be jealous if you are “jealous”. It’s hard to suppress this feeling and rarely does anyone have the willpower to tell themselves: “Don’t be jealous!”, but you don’t need to do this. At least you should have enough strength and common sense don't show it. Because jealousy is a direct path to the destruction of relationships.

Initially, when memories of first dates are still fresh in the memory, open manifestations of jealousy: “Why did you smile at the waitress?”, “Who is this new girl at your work? Is she more beautiful than me?”, “So I believed you, that you were late at work, probably just saw a pretty girl,” etc., all this can be perceived as evidence of love and fear of losing a lover. But later, it becomes painful for the guy and jealousy gradually overshadows all the good things that exist between you.

Over time, a man begins to consider your jealousy as a manifestation of distrust of himself. How pleasant do you think it is to be around someone who doesn't trust you? How can a guy make plans for the future? life together with you and see you as my wife, if there are already problems of this kind in the relationship? I think that you can answer this question yourself.

I would like to draw your attention to the fact that it does not matter at all whether you have grounds for jealousy or not. In any case, manifestations of jealousy are unacceptable. Because if jealousy is unfounded - your a good relationship will be destroyed, and if it is justified, then the relationship will still not be saved with its help.
By demonstrating your jealousy, you will only once again convince the guy that he needs to leave you, even if he is still hesitant about making such a decision.

Female investigator

Control and “torture” with interrogation usually stem from jealousy, but a woman does not always show a desire to control a man “under jealousy.” Very often we try to veil the desire to know about every step of our loved one into concern about him, about his health, life and well-being. In reality, we are worried about ourselves.

But even if we assume that you are really worried, all the same, a man views this: either as an encroachment on his freedom; or as an attempt to dominate him even in small things. The guy does not forgive such an attitude, especially if he is not used to reporting for his every step to his mother or older sister.

Constant attempts at total control over a man’s movement in space, treating him as a suspect in a crime and the ensuing “investigative experiments” with “noticing” time and asking “inconvenient” questions are almost guaranteed to lead to the guy leaving you.

Let me take an example from the life of one of my clients. This will be a little long, but I want to convey the absurdity of the situation:

- Okay, the street was blocked, but you could go through the yard!
“At first I went that way, but there was a big puddle in the yard, and I was forced to go back to the bus stop and walk along the boulevard - in a detour.”
- Well, where was this puddle?
— Just under the arch in front of the entrance to the courtyard, it was impossible to get around it without getting your feet wet!
- Let's say tomorrow I'll check whether there is a puddle there or not. But you didn’t have to go back, but went along the side street!
- Listen, tomorrow the puddle may dry up, and you won’t see anything there anymore!
- It’s okay, if, as you say, the puddle was very large, then it won’t have time to dry... but don’t dodge, answer the question!
- Which one?!
- Which I just asked you!
“Is this about why I couldn’t get through the yard?”
- Don't make a fool of yourself! I asked why didn't you go down the side street?!!!
— Because this street has bad coverage, and I thought that there were also a lot of big puddles after the rain.
- Did you see that? Did you see these puddles or just thought that they might be there?
- No, I didn’t see any puddles, because I immediately returned to the bus stop!
- So you didn’t see the puddles, so why do you claim that they were there?!!!
“I’m not saying, I’m guessing!”
- Well, okay, let's leave this question for now. So you're saying you took a detour, right?
- Well, yes!
- Yeah, we count... from the stop to the arch - about 10 minutes, the same time back, total 20. From the stop to the cinema across the boulevard, about another 10 minutes, total 30 minutes. But you spent a whole (I’ll look at my watch now) 37 minutes on the road!!!
“Listen, we’re already late for the cinema because of the showdown you started here.”
“So you’re saying that today is ruined because of me?!” It turns out interesting... and it’s all my fault!!! And all because you are lying to me!!! Tell the truth, where have you been all this time???!!!

Funny? From the outside - yes, but for a guy there is nothing funny in this, especially if this is repeated for any reason and for no reason.

The woman is the owner “you are my life!”

Typically, representatives of this behavior model torment the guy with their attention. Not even that - they demand undivided attention to themselves and simply “crush” a man with their love, demanding that the guy spend all his time in their company.

This is less reminiscent of jealousy and deprivation of basic freedoms, but you still need to remember that, despite your boundless love for your partner, he is a person, and a free person. The guy will not necessarily experience exactly the same feelings for you that you experience for him, but this does not mean that he does not love you!

No, he loves you and loves you very much, but he also has other interests - work, friends, parents, a desire to be alone with himself, to engage in his favorite hobby, etc. If you yourself do not have such desires, this does not mean that the guy should give up his own, only for the reason that he is “the only light in the window” for you and therefore is simply obliged to love you in exactly the way that you do to him you impose.

If, after reading this article, you recognize yourself in it or find even a slight similarity, consider adjusting your behavior, otherwise you have every chance of joining the ranks of those who ask the question: “Why did He leave me?” and... does not find an answer.

FROM THE AUTHOR: My responses in the comments are the opinion of an individual and not the advice of a specialist. I’m trying to answer everyone without exception, but unfortunately I don’t physically have time to study long stories, analyze them, ask questions about them and then answer in detail, and I also don’t have the opportunity to accompany your situations, because this requires a huge amount of free time, and I have very little of it.

In this regard, I kindly ask you to ask specific questions on the topic of the article, and do not expect that I will advise in the comments or accompany your situation.

Of course, you can ignore my request (which many people do), but in this case, be prepared for the fact that I may not answer you. This is not a matter of principle, but solely of time and my physical capabilities. Don't be offended.

If you want to receive qualified help, please seek advice, and I will devote my time and knowledge to you with full dedication.

With respect and hope for understanding, Frederica

The relationship with the guy is developing as well as possible, and you are all flying and glowing with happiness! Often in such wonderful moments, girls begin to think about what it would be like to lose a loved one. Of course, no lucky woman would want this, and I think you don’t want a breakup either. Why? let's find out and learn the basic tips on how not to lose a guy and make your relationship even stronger.

Mistakes girls make in relationships

If you want to understand how not to lose a guy, then first you need to learn about typical mistakes girls in relationships with guys, and try to never commit them.

Your boyfriend is the best, the smartest and just wonderful! Remember this, even when during a quarrel you want to be rude to him or say a bunch of nasty things. Often girls greatly offend their boyfriends with angry words, shouting, and criticism. Guys don’t like to be criticized, humiliated, compared with other guys, or praised in their presence for the virtues of other guys (Brad Pitt is a sexy handsome man! - never say these and similar expressions in his presence). In general, be very careful with your words, think before you say anything to a guy.

Women's hysterics, tears, showdowns - all this needs to be left behind. Learn to behave with restraint and calm. A sobbing, screaming, angry, noisy, touchy, always whining, dissatisfied girl only pushes you away. So you will show yourself not in at its best, and you definitely won’t evoke good mutual feelings.

A lot of guys complain that girls don't understand them. The guys are not from another planet, he’s just different in his psychology, and this needs to be understood. He is not interested in what cool blouse you bought for yourself, what happened with your friend Katya, how your favorite TV series ended, etc. Save conversations on women's topics for communicating with friends. Also, you shouldn’t be hostile to every acquaintance of his, or create scenes of jealousy; he may have friends among girls.

When a guy says that he wants to be alone today or relax with friends, don’t interfere, because he, like you, has the right to take a break from relationships. In general, there can be a lot of such nuances, I advise you to study the psychology of men, you will understand a lot and will be able to save your relationship from unnecessary problems.

Guys are owners by nature. It will be great if he thinks that many people like you, but only one is faithful to him. The sympathy of other guys for you will flatter him and fuel his interest in you thanks to slight jealousy, and your loyalty will show him that you are a worthy girl for a serious relationship. However, in the presence of a guy, do not flirt with his friends and acquaintances, it is ugly and not very good for many reasons.

How not to lose a guy? Try to get rid of these qualities, they really irritate guys, and sometimes make them think about breaking up with a girl:

• Imbalance.
• Talkativeness.
• The desire to be first in a relationship.
• Ingratitude.
• Boringness.
• The habit of gossiping.
• Reluctance to compromise, to look for ways out of difficult situations in relationships.
• Reluctance to ask for forgiveness and admit guilt.
• Reluctance to discuss your desires, needs, or talk about what you don’t like about your partner.
• Doubts about your boyfriend, lack of faith in his success, lack of support.
• Obsessiveness and annoyingness.
• Deceit.
• Excessive self-criticism and self-deprecation.

How to improve relationships

Of course, to understand how not to lose a guy, it is important to say a few words about how to improve your relationship. If the relationship is strong and healthy, then he himself will not want to leave you!

• Praise him, a lot and sincerely, admire him, say good words and compliments, thank him for what he does for you. Tender and sincere words The guy is ready to listen to his girlfriend for a long time, they are very pleasant to him. But everything should be in moderation: make sure that your speeches do not turn into lisp - no one will like that.
• Develop mutual interest. Find common hobbies, things that are interesting to both, travel, learn new things, get fresh experiences together, go to new places. The more new experiences you get together, the stronger your relationship will be, the more interesting you will be to him. Be proactive in finding mutual interests.
• If you got into a relationship with a guy sexual relations, then don’t be afraid of variety in bed, offer him new ideas, show him your desire, be passionate and tender. For men, sex has great importance, so a girl needs to behave especially correctly in bed.
• Don't forget to take care of your appearance. It’s nice for a guy to be next to a beautiful and well-groomed girl, and it’s quite possible for you to make yourself like that! If this is all right, then just maintain your beauty: eat right, get enough sleep, exercise, take care of your hair, nails and skin, choose clothes and makeup wisely.

Now you know how not to lose a guy. Of course, in this matter much more nuances than described here, so study male psychology, watch your boyfriend, try to feel what he likes and what repels you. Analyze, draw conclusions, behave correctly, and everything will be great!